Merigian Studios


How About Yours

How About Yours?

I thought I would start out my blog today by telling everyone the tale of my last two weeks or so. It is a funny tale as I look back on it now. But funny is not usually how we perceive life when we are in the unrelenting turbulence of fate and destiny.

Seven months ago, I scheduled to have my dental implant to be uncovered on February 26th, 2015 at 11:00 am. At the time, it did not occur to me that something would happen that would move that appointment. At the time of making the appointment, I was working on a mystery case in a worker's compensation action. It appeared that a man became ill, developed asthma and no doctor could figure out why. So the employee and a couple of physicians took the default position, blaming his illness on the workplace, even though he had worked at the same job for fifteen years with no prior history of illness or injury on the job. I finished the report in September 2014 and proved that to a reasonable degree of medical certainty, his illness was not work related. In November 2014, the attorney for the defense claimed the only day she could take my deposition was February 26th at 11:00 am. I had to reschedule my dental appointment.

The dentist's office was very accommodating and moved my appointment to Thursday March 5th, 2015 at 1:00 pm. In the meanwhile, I have been and continue to work on a new reflective Merigian Studios website with a company called Speak Creative. They are located in Cordova, Tennessee by the Harding elementary school campus on Macon road. The account manager has a long history of cancelling meeting for various reasons. The website has been under design for about two years. Due to a conflict that arose in the account representative's life, and there are new ones each and every day, she decided to cancel a meeting set for February 19th, 2015 and reschedule it for March 5th, 2015 at 1:00 pm. Otherwise she could not meet to go over their progress for at least another month or more. From what I can tell, they only work on the website the night before our meetings. At this rate, I thought we would never see the website up and running. So the dentist was more than accommodating and moved my appointment to March 12th at 10:30 am. Everything was scheduled and ready to come about.

Four working days before the deposition, the defense attorney emailed and cancelled the deposition on February 26th. It appeared from her note that opposing counsel would be out of the state working on another case. I am not naive to the trickery of plaintiffs' counsels, I had done years of expert witness work as a forensic toxicologist a decade or more ago and most of the time, and they cancel their depositions at the last minute, only to reschedule months out. My guess is that plaintiff's counsel cannot find an expert to refute my findings and if the deposition occurs, defense counsel will be able to make a motion to dismiss the case on a lack of merit. Whatever the reason, February 26th was now open for whatever reason.

When I rescheduled my appointment with Speak Creative accounts' representative, she made it clear barring any unforeseen circumstances such as her two young children being ill, or the weather being poor, she and the designer of the website would be ready to show me the progress they have made. The night before the meeting, when the weather was changing for the worse, I got on the website to see the progress: none. Nothing had changed from the meeting one month ago or more. As Shelby County announced school closings due to inclement weather, Speak's representative was emailing and texting the cancellation of our March 5th, 2015 get together. She also had to reschedule our meeting a minimum of two weeks away because she had planned to take March 12th, 2015 off months ago, she could not break her willfully imposed order of her tumultuous life.

I was not surprised. The weather has affected two other scheduled meeting with her and as a result, there has not been any progress on the website for over two months or more. At least I have my dental appointment to look forward to this week as well as the time changing to daylight saving time. But anything can happen at any time.

What is the point of all of this? Life has a pattern of unfoldment that is neither predictable nor logical. There is no master plan that is guiding any of us from point A to point B. It just happens. In our current world of emails, texts, phone calls, overnight shipments, Facebook, Twitter, television news media, reality shows of dysfunctional human relationships, religious prophets professing the end of the world, we have become subjected to an endless web of chaos in which most people have lost their personal sense of responsibility. Some people under the gravitational weight of God, use a number of worn out constructs to explain the unexplainable. Some profess that their center point of their life is God and they would on this occasion say that the last three weeks of irresponsible behaviors and weather catastrophes have all been a part of God's plan. It maybe, but for some reason I do not believe that the Almighty is the backbone of our human or nature's mayhem, nor is the Devil.

Illnesses come in many shapes and sizes, from a common cold that stems from an opportunistic virus to the ravages of metastatic cancer. I have seen many loving and caring people become afflicted with terrible illnesses, who ultimately come to the realization that they wish to have a moment of absolute silence from pain and suffering and just revel in the light of simple beingness. This is neither God’s nor the Devil's work. Illness has a way of breaking us down into little pieces, making us find something good out of something bad. Little successes become paramount to giving us the spirit to go at it another day. No matter how chaotic the world becomes, no matter how desperate one gets, no matter how frustrated one is with their illness and/or the lack of recovery and the constant rumination about why they were chosen to manifest their disease, cruelty to others as a way of expressing their discontent is absolutely forbidden. It is okay to be angry, it is not okay to be malicious and spiteful, especially to those who are trying so hard to care for them.

The same goes for those who are working on my website or trying to schedule a deposition. These are not life and death situations, they are at most, annoying. But they are experiences that are within the same natural iterations that follow all of us in our lives, the same fractal patterns of randomness can be found everywhere. So when life seems unexplainable, it is. And at some point you will realize that it is healthier to stop expecting man made order to control chaos; it cannot.

All of our lives are in chaos to some degree or another, some greater than others. I know mine is, how about yours?

Posted by Amanda Sanders at 9:01 AM
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